I’m sure the mentors will probably have some better advice for you in a bit, but your post caught my eye and I thought I would let you know my thoughts. Most pilots are very aware of the fact that flying can be quite dangerous if you are not properly trained and/or if an airplane is not airworthy. This is why there is so much emphasis placed on safety. Someone correct me if I’m wrong, but I think it’s been almost 10 years since a US airline has lost an airplane. (Colgan flight 3407 on Feb 12th 2009) That’s over 10 years ago!!
(There have been some accidents involving cargo planes in recent years. Atlas Air 3591 in Anahuac, Texas and UPS 1354 in Birmingham ,Alabama come to mind).
Despite these accidents, commercial aviation is safer today than it has ever been. If you’re still worried, just think about this fact… you could have been on every single flight operated by a US carrier in the last 10 years and you would be just fine!! That’s almost 100 million flights!!! (source; Bloomberg)
(With the exception of Jennifer Riordan on the Southwest flight where a CFM 56 failed spectacularly)
Obviously you will have to make it to the airlines in planes and operations that are not part 121.
I will be honest with you, very recently a well known local pilot crashed and burned just a few miles from my house and I have struggled some of the same worries you have shared. This is why your post caught my eye.
I have continued with my flight training and still enjoy flying but it was a reminder to me that to be be a safe pilot you must always be vigilant in maintaining proficiency. Also two things that I would stress to all pilots…ALWAYS check your airspeed before making turns in the pattern and don’t let the airplane get ahead of you. You can almost always give yourself some time to get things figured out. Know your limitations. Sorry I could go on forever… one more thing and then I’ll shut up. I find it interesting that people will jump into a car without a thought, even though more than 37,000 people died in car accidents in 2017! However if an airplane goes down everyone likes to remind me how dangerous it is to fly… any thoughts anyone???
Hope this helps Emanuel! Don’t worry, once you start flying more you’ll get comfortable in the air. I know I did!!